Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Ode to Duct Tape

To wear cotton socks is a common mistake,
But a newbie I was
And mistake I did make.

In my clean laundry, not a running sock found,
But sitting innocently in my closet,
Cotton socks were abound.

I had no way of knowing the toll I would pay
For wearing those snugly socks,
Which I rue to this day.

Grabbing a pair that were thick and long,
I nonchalantly decided
To slip them both on.

The Nike swooshes smiled and them innocent I did deem,
Those plush, warm socks...
How much harm could they mean?

The back of my mind worried,
But out the thoughts were shut.
I just hoped this wouldn't later bite me in the butt.

My toes as toasty as bread,
The cotton enveloping my feet,
I set out for my run on the snow-packed street.

For the first several miles
Absolutely nothing was amiss,
And running, as usual, was 100% bliss.

But the pain came on suddenly,
As fast as a twister,
And it became clear I was the victim of a blister.

The next day the blister hadn't improved very much,
As the skin, rubbed raw,
Hurt to the touch.

WHY ME?! I wondered aloud to the running gods (who were in the mood to smite)
But they pointed to the cotton socks with amusement
And the running gods were right.

First I tried covering it with a blister Band-Aid,
But the bandage fell off...
The running gods, I could not persuade.

The next day I was determined to run.
A blister Band-Aid and duct tape around my foot
Was my attempt to reduce the friction.

Miraculously the blister, which had wrought so much pain,
Held up through the miles,
I couldn't complain.
The running gods had had a change of heart!
The fact that duct tape is so useful
Is a message I feel compelled to impart.

There is an important lesson in this tale:
Don't wear cotton socks,
Or with a blister you may ail.

But you needn't worry of blisters; have no fear!
All your problems will be solved,
For duct tape is here!

"Duct tape is like the force: It has a dark side and a light side and it holds the universe together."
- Carl Zwanzig

For additional practical applications of duct tape, see 101 Uses for Duct Tape.

1 comment:

  1. Cotton socks are okay if it's a blend of cotton+some fabric suitable for running that supposedly prevents blisters but never really does until I develop callouses. My current socks are a bamboo cotton pair from the Wal-Mart. They come if various thicknesses and sock heights. I notice I have to pay more attention to the thickness because sometimes the socks will slip down rub the back of my heel are raw.

    I applaud your use of duct-tape. I know they now come in pretty colors, but the thought of it touching my skin terrifies me. I'm guessing there's an easy way to remove it, like soaking the skin in warm, sudsy water?